To Say No

I don't understand addiction. The apparent loss of control. The willingness to sacrifice health, money, family, friends for a little bit of a rush. Or a brief escape from reality.

I've always had the ability to stop when I wanted. Or to say no. The only thing that ever held a grip one me was, strangely enough, Mountain Dew. I even remember the last one I had: August 3rd, 1999.

At the time, I didn't realize what I was consuming. Never thought to look. Each night like four or six of them. "Green devil," we'd call it. A quarter per can from the machine just outside our office. A dollar a night. Sometimes more. Helped pass the time. But while waiting for Liam to be born, I noticed the contents of the bottle. The sugar. The caffeine. The calories. And I quit that moment. Cold turkey. Twelve plus years ago. They still call my names sometime. But the voices grow fainter each year.